WWED?
by k.lutz17
Summary: A summer alone. No parents. No Rules. All Emmett! When the 'family' comes back from college for a summer together, nothing will ever be the same! Summary sux but better story inside so read it! : AH BXE EmXR JXA Written by k.lutz17 and ninjascantspell
1. Prologue

**This story is made by me and the fabulous **_**ninjascantspell**_**.**

**W.W.E.D? Guess what is means and you get a cyber cookie.**

**I own nothing! Because this world is cruel.**

**~I~L~o~v~e~E~m~m~e~t~t~!~**

**Emmett POV **

I thought the school year would never end. Did they really think half of that stuff was important? I mean seriously, do I need to know who the 17th president was, and how he accomplished so much? I'll never meet the guy! I don't care about his life. He could have saved man kind, and I'd be like 'That guy's kinda cool. He saved man kind.' I wouldn't remember his name. I mentally shook my head. Some people these days.

There were 7 people I cared about. 7 people who I would remember their name is they saved mankind, because I would probably be the one to almost destroy it. They were the people I was on my way to see. Carlisle and Esme, my parents, who were supposed to be leaving a few days after I got back, for some trip that would take up there whole summer. Edward, my little brother, who hopefully is getting over his issues with his sex life, because I feel kind of bad for my sad little brother. I thought I had been a better influence. Bella, Edward's girlfriend who had been like my little sister since she was 3. What fun it is to make her blush. Alice, the little pixie and also Bella's adoptive sister. Jasper, my best friend, and currently trying to tame the little pixie. Rose, Jasper's hotter twin, and also my beautiful girlfriend. These are the people that make up my life.

'Bet On It' from HSM2 started playing; it was slightly muffled by the materials of my jeans.

"Hey Jazz, what's up?"

"Nothing really. Just driving home, thinking. So I was thinking we could have a little bet. We are gonna race home. Whoever gets there last has to bring in _all_ luggage."

The girls, except Bella, loved their luggage. That would be like 50 bags by themselves.

"Deal. Let the race begin." With that I closed my phone, but I heard a faint laugh coming from the other line. I pressed my foot down harder on the pedal.

**~I~L~o~v~e~E~m~m~e~t~t~!~**

NO! That is not Jasper's car. That is not Jasper's car. That is not Jasper's car. That is totally Jasper's car, and I am definitely going to have to carry thousands of pounds of luggage. I got out and made my way to the door.

"Looks like you lost." Jasper was sitting in the porch. I wouldn't let him get to me.

"So. I'll just have to lift some small," I gulped, "bags. No big deal." Somehow everyone got here before I did. Thinking back, the laugh on the phone sounded like Rosalie's. How could Rosalie have been in Jasper's car? I scratched my chin. Something didn't feel right. Let's see… Rose in Jasper's car? No she wasn't. She rode home in her convertible, that was still nicely packed with bags. That means that Jasper was probably just at a gas station and Rose was there too.

I went out to get the bags. I can do this. I'm a man. A manly man.

~Hour Later~

I lied down on the couch, hoping I would never have to lift anything else in my life.

"Awe, poor baby. Had too lift a few bags filled with clothes. He must be so tired," Jasper taunted from across the room.

"Bite me." With that I fell into a peaceful slumber.


	2. Froot Loops

**Another chapter of W.W.E.D? Has anyone found out what it means?**

**I wish Twilight belonged to me.**

**But it belongs to dear Stephenie.**

**The men, the girls, and all the fun**

**But this world's mine. Just this one. **

**Ninjascantspell: So ya… we came up with this story in an oh so boring day in social studies class… fun times… **

**And 17 is now interrupting because I know none of you want our life story.**

**And here is the chapter!**

**~I~L~o~v~e~E~m~m~e~t~t~!~**

What is that light? Am I dead? Am I supposed to go into the light? They say not to in the movies. I now know that bugs are idiots. That light is not beautiful at all. It practically screams BLINDING!!! What is that noise? This must not be heaven.

"Emmett!!" The voice was followed by more hollow clangs. Different voices began chanting my name.

"Wake up!"

"Emmett!"

"Dude!"

"Seriously get up!"

_I don't like heaven._

I reluctantly opened my eyes; that was a mistake. The ground was littered with bull horns, maracas, and other objects used just for the purpose of making noise. A lamp was focused intently on my face. I squinted my eyes against the glare and fumbled for the switch. When I turned it off I could more clearly see the mess. Jazz, Alice, Bella, Edward, and Rosalie were set up around the room slamming pans together. I raised myself till I was being held up by my elbows.

"Can you guys, like, posibbly leave? I was happy sleeping," I tried to be as polite as possible, but how would you react to this barbaric wake call? I know I just sounded like a pansy, 'barbaric wake up call?' but I'm exhausted! And whose fault is that? The children of the corn theat surrounded me! That's who!

"No. You have to get up now," Alice stated. She looked the most like the evil children that were now after me. I could even hear the music playing in the background. _Did they give me drugs while I was sleeping? That is wrong in so many ways ._

"Sure Alice. I'll get up. Since clearly I will get no sleep in this house," I looked at the items that were scattered around the room. "What is on the agenda for the day? After you clean up this mess," They would never get me to clean it for them.

"We are going to take mom and dad to the airport," Edward spoke from beside the couch as he leaned down to pick up a tamborine.

"Okay then. What time do we have to leave?" I asked.

"As soon as we are done here."

"Cool. I'm gonna get something to eat." I walked over to the kitchen and got myself a bowl of froot loops and sat myself down at the breakfast table. Froot loops are my favorite cereal. I mean they're way better than cheerios. I mean when you think about it froot loops are just gay cheerios! That doesn't make much sense because aren't cheerios supposed to be happy? They named them cheerios after all… Hmm… these are the questions that haunt me…

_I forgot a spoon…_

I walked over the the drawer where we kept all our silverware. I looked inside. There were no spoons. _All the spoons must be dirty… _I reached for a fork instead. I walked back over to the table with my fork in hand ready to eat my cereal. I sat down and dunked my fork into the milk. When I raised my fork out it carried a couple colorful circles but the milk slipped through. I wasn't happy without the milky goodness, so I put it back into the bowl. Again I raised it out, but the milk continued to seep through the the cracks. _Damn it! _

Frustrated I got up and went to the drawer carrying my fork. I whipped it open and rummaged through the contents. I finally found the duct tape. _Success! _

I found the end and quickly ripped it out. I connected the tip with the side of the fork and wrapped it around and around, closing the cracks and making a squishy padding. I ripped the tape with my teeth. Content I threw the duct tape back into the draw and closed it. I walked back and sat down at the table. I put my fork back inside and raised it up. Some milk seeped into the tape, so I quickly brought it to my mouth.

_This is disgusting! _ The tape made it sticky and unappetizing.

I rose from my chair and ripped the tape from my fork, throwing both to the floor. I went to the sink where I saw the discarded spoons. I picked one up and turned on the water. I quickly washed it and went my back to my froot loops.

This time when I raised them from my bowl they were just a soggy mush in the milk. I threw the bowl to the floor, where it shattered with a crash. The noise calmed me.

"Emmett, what was that?" I heard Esme called. _I have to dispose of the evidence. _

"Nothing," I claimed with innocence. I heard footsteps approaching. I grabbed a few napkins and threw them over the mess. Just then Esme appeared. I jumped in front of the mess and leaned on the table casually. Her eyes appraised my stance.

"What did you do?" She asked, apparently she didn't believe me.

"Why would you think I did anything?" my voice rose in panic.

She just continued to stare. My heart began to pound. Faster. Faster. I looked left to right. I could feel a sweat break out on my head. I quickly wiped the back of my hand across my forhead. I looked left again, then right.

"Okay! I confess! I broke the bowl!" I fell to my knees and quickly discarded the napkins so she could see what I had done. I kneeled in front of her.

"Please forgive me! I'm sorry! It started it," I pointed as I accused the bowl.

"Emmett, get up and stop acting like a child." I rose from my feet. "Now clean this up," she walked away.

I began picking up the small pieces of glass that littered the floor. I tiptoed my way through the debris towards the trash can. I came back with more paper towels and began mopping up the mess. _This is not working. _I went and grabbed a mop from the pantry, discarding the paper towels on the way.

I began humming a beat that popped into my head.

"_I'm cleaning up my kitchen. _

_So Esme won't be bitching."_

"EMMETT!" _ Oops. _Esme had heard my song.

"_I had just wanted to eat my cereal," _ I continued.

"_But the fork had caused such problems._

_I tried so hard to solve them._

_Now I'm cleaning up this stupid mess," _I began to sing into the end of the mop.

"_I am still so hungry._

_My tummy is grumbly._

_And I just stepped on a piece of glass," _I had gotten so into my song that my dance moves began to become erratic. My foot had come down on a stray piece of glass. Pain shot through my leg. _Ow!_

I began to hop towards the medicine cabinet. I kept my balance and reached in to grab a bandaid. I hopped back toward the kitchen table and sat down. I put my left foot on my right thigh with the bottom up. I quickly pulled out the piece of glass, and lay it down on top of the table. I grabbed the bandaid and gently put it onto the cut.

I hopped back towards the mess and finished my cleaning.

"Lets go Emmett," Edward called from the door.

"Coming," I hopped towards the others.

I slipped on some shoes and hopped out the door to my jeep, which already carried Esme and Carlisle's bags. Everyone stood staring as I hopped past them. I hopped into the backseats of my jeep and waited for everyone else. Rosalie climbed back here and sat next to me followed by Alice. Everyone else filed into the car, with Edward drving and Bella in the passenger seat.

We finally began driving. I layed my hands on top of my stomach. I felt a strange beat radiate through my hands. I looked down at them and realized it was my heart beat. "I can feel my heart beat in my tummy," I announced to the group.

Everyone turned to look at me. "Keep your eyes on the road Edward," Bella told him without taking her eyes from me. He reluctantly turned around, but I could see him steal glances at me in the mirror.

"Where did I go wrong?" I heard Esme silently ask herself. I gaped at her. She just insulted her favorite son. I thought I should voice my opinion.

"How could you insult your facorite son?" I heard Edward let out a guffaw.

"You are so very strange," Rosalie said from beside me.

"Awe, I love you too," I laid a big sloppy kiss on her cheek, which caused her to giggle and slap my shoulder.

"Emmett, what did you do to your foot?" she asked me.

I looked out the window. "Nothing. Just stepped on a big piece of glass." I knew I was trying to make myself sound manly, but she will never know.

"How big was it Emmett?" Her voice informed me that she knew I was lying.

"Big."

"Yea, sure." The rest of the ride was taken in silence.

"You guys better be good. I don't want to come home to my house burned down," Esme warned as we were unloading things from the trunk.

"Don't worry mom. We're only going to be throwing a couple of parties. The house won't be burned down. Maybe just falling apart, but we'll still be able to live in it," I tried to explain my plans to her with a smile, but she was not pleased.

"Okay. Edward you're in charge," she said.

"But Mom I'm the oldest," I objected.

"Age is but a number, and you're the one that acts the youngest."

Edward laughed, but I was not pleased. We said our final goodbyes then all filed back into the jeep. "You know I'm not going to listen to you even though mom said you were in charge, right?" I told him from the driver's seat.

"Whatever you say Emmett. Whatever you say." 

**~I~L~o~v~e~E~m~m~e~t~t~!~**

**The chapter is over! The parents have left! Now Emmett's fun can begin!**

**I was watching Twilight and this is my take on the part where Edward and Bella have their famous make out scene! Let my crazy fun begin! **

**EPOV**

I like watching people sleep cuz im a stalker. People sleeping is facsnitaing so I'm like gonna make out with Kristin Stewart. Cuz again I shall mention that I am a stalker. Now she is jumpin me and I jump her then I jump back and hurt my back on the wall. I think about leavin but she convinces me not too. So she tells me about her life. About how she killed three goldfish, I feel a little drunk maybe thts why im here, she is kinda creepy looking. She needs to get off of me cuz she is wrinkling my shirt and she smells. Not in a good way. Her blood smells godd though. Charlie almost shoots me when I mention baseball. I think he wants bella to spray my eyes with pepper spray. Bella looks funny in a baseball hat. RANDOM WATERFALL! This is my favorite scene. Music begins playing as a thunder storm rolls in. Strange. In the end I almost kill bella. Cry cry.


	3. Cart Races, Goldfish, and Giettas

A/N Hello again fans of W.W.E.D? And clearly I'm talking to no one because none of you are reviewing. Roar!

**Ninjascantspell says rawr. Antywho… on to the disclaimer.**

**Disclaimer: WE don't own Twilight. Even though we wish we did, because that would be cool.**

**~I~L~o~v~e~E~m~m~e~t~t~ (who doesn't?)**

"I don't want to go!"

"Emmett, get up you are coming," Rosalie didn't like to raise her voice. She just added a little bit of venom into each word and that was enough to make you do what she said.

"Can I get candy if I go?"

"Yes Emmett, you can get candy," she said with a sigh.

"Okay. I'm coming." I quickly got up and followed everyone out to their cars. We were on our way to Wal-Mart AKA Wally World. The real reason we were going shopping was because we were running low on food, but I had a different agenda in mind.

We entered Wally World and I immediately turned my attention to the shopping carts. I looked at my family that surrounded me. My eyes met with Jasper and Edward. I nodded mutely.

"RACING!" I yelled. The three of us ran over towards the shopping carts when I realized we were at uneven teams. "Jasper! Grab Alice!!" I saw him turn around in his tracks and grab his girlfriend caveman style. Edward and I each grabbed a shopping cart and ran towards the dairy section. I could hear Rosalie and Bella screaming at us to come back, but I blocked them from my mind.

We quickly hopped into different carts. Alice and Edward were seated inside the large cart, Jasper and I were situated behind them. The teams were Edward and me, versus Alice and Jazz. We stood behind an unseen line, looked at each other and Alice started the race with a single shout, "Go!"

We raced down isles neck and neck. I started pushing Edward faster. We were winning, the finish line so close, until I saw the goldfish. I have a strange obsession with goldfish. I mean they are like gold and whatnot. Who doesn't like a goldfish, not just the tasty treats that smile at you with such adoration. No, I'm speaking of the live little animals that swim in coy ponds. By the way, what is a coy pond? I mean I know of such things as a coy smile but a coy pond? That makes no sense to me.

"Emmett, you just made us lose! Why did you stop?" Edward shouted from inside the cart as he began to climb out. I finally realized that when I started to think about the golden fish I had stopped the cart, letting Alice and Jasper finish the race before us.

"Redo!" I shouted, but Jasper and Alice continued their victory dance.

"Nope. You lost fair and square," Alice said as she spun in a circle.

"THIS IS A BLOODY OUTRAGE!"

"Emmett, keep it down. I don't want to get kicked out of another Wal-Mart." Jasper walked over to me and put his hand on my shoulder. "Dude, why you gotta bite my moment? Does it taste good?"

I made a slurping noise, "Delicious."

"Children, let's go," Bella and Rosalie came around the corner with an already full basket.

"But mom, I want to go again!" I said in a childish voice.

"Stop whining." I walked over to her basket and realized she forgot to get pudding cups.

"Wait! I need pudding!"

"Jasper, go with him," I looked at Rosalie with a shocked expression.

Jasper and I began walking down the isles. Then I saw a teddy bear. A small, black teddy bear. "I want it."

"Rose won't let you have it. Let's go." I looked left and right and quickly stuffed it into Jasper's sweatshirt. "Dude! I'm not stealing this thing for you."

"Shut up! It's not stealing. It's borrowing."

"When will you return it?"

"Never. But no one else knows that. Take it. I'm going to get my pudding."

I quickly jogged to the next isle, got my pudding and headed back to everyone else, placing it on the checkout counter. Jasper still had a small lump in his sweatshirt.

We all walked out to car, and drove home in silence.

"Good job, Jasper. Mission accomplished." I took the bear from his sweatshirt.

"Hopefully the cops don't come for you." Jasper said as he walked away. I started to play with my little bear. _My little buddy needs a name. Hmmm…Frank? No… Jeff? No… Oh! I know! _Gietta_! _I started to play with my little _Gietta_. Throwing him up in the air then catching him.

"Em! Where are you?" Rose called for me from the other room.

"In here Rosie!" I replied. _Oh no… I have to hide _Gietta_. _I looked all around the room as I hear Rose's footsteps come closer. I looked down. _Well there's a place to hide him._ I shoved _Gietta_ down my pants as Rose came in.

"Hey Rose!" I said "What's up?" I laughed nervously.

"Em, cops are at the door and they're asking for you," She said.

_Oh no… Jasper must have ratted me out! How could he do this to me?! I mean we've been through so much together! He must still be mad about the whole 'biting his moment' thing. Man he can be such a baby sometimes…_

"Emm, are you listening to me?" Rose asked waving her hand in my face. I then realized that _Gietta_ was still in my pants… _Poor little guy, having to share that already small compartment with something soooo.. _"Emmett!" my thoughts were once more disturbed by my Rosie.

"What Rose?" I asked, obviously I hadn't been paying attention. She just rolled her eyes at me and took my hand. She started to drag me towards the front of the house. "Rosie," I complained. "Where are you taking me?" she kept quiet and kept pulling me. Usually she tells me where we're going… this can't be good.

She pulled me to the door where I saw a police officer standing, facing away from the house. His back was to me. "Uh… hello…," he turned around to reveal Charlie. "Hey Charlie, I don't know where Bella is. I'll go get her for you." I turned to walk away.

"No, I'm here because I need to talk to you, and right now it is Chief Swan."

"Okay then. Well, how can I help you Chief Swan?"

"Emmett, have you committed any crimes lately?" He looked me right in the eyes.

"No." I looked left. He knew about _Gietta_.

"I'm going to have to take you downtown."

"It was Jasper! He took the bear. I swear!" He just stared at me. "Okay it was me. I'm sorry! The bear was there, and it was just so cute! I mean," I cleared my throat, "I was gonna give it to Rosalie." Charlie broke down in to fits of laughter. The rest of the family came tumbling out, tears streaming out of their eyes, as they laughed profusely.

"Why is everyone laughing at me?"

It was Bella who tried to explain, "Emmett… Jasper paid…," her sentences were cut off by fits of laughter. She took a deep breath and tried again. "Emmett, Jasper paid for that bear when you went to get your pudding. We called Charlie down here to make it seem like you were going to jail." Then she exploded into laughs again.

"You are rude. Jasper you're dead." He took off running, but I caught up to him and tackled him onto the couch.

"Emmett, I'm afraid I have to take you downtown now for assault." Charlie put the handcuffs on my wrists and started to drag me out of the house.

"No. I'm sorry. Tell him Jazz." Jazz just shook his head and started to laugh again.

"I guess I'll have to find someone else while you're in jail, Em." Rosalie said.

"Rosie no!" Charlie put me in the back of his cop car, hopped in the front and drove off with the sirens going. I looked back at my family, who were again rolling on the floor laughing. _I hate them. _"Charlie, jokes over. Let me go now. I'm done with the law."

He turned around and dropped me off. He walked over with the key in hand to unlock my handcuffs; after they were off I took them back. "I think I'll keep these."

"Hey Jazz, I hear I a storm is coming. I just wanna handcuff you to a tree."

**Alright people. Another chapter. This chapter is dedicated to **_**Stick It!**_** another amazing movie with the fabulous Kellan.**

**Review and I'll give you a cyber gietta!**

**For those of you that don't speak Spanish gietta means cookie.. :) **

**READ AND REVIEW…**


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